Hello Ladies and Gems.

As of this minute I'm sipping a Carlsberg and browsing the web and seeing a couple of my friends' blogs. I haven't done this is a while I must say!!

I am also doubly at leisure today because I had a presentation in my Unit yesterday and, as all presentations go, was conceptualized and executed in the wee hours of the morning and I had barely slept. The presentation had gone on a bit better than expected and so I was more relieved than happy when it was over 'cos I really wanted to sleep after that!

What made the experience more palatable for me was that one of the faculty members, whom I have a lot of respect for, told me that I had done a good job with the presentation and basically a well done comment was made. I was quite happy actually, and that comment sort of made the day for me.

Please bear with me here. This is not an ego trip I assure you!!

The need for validation by outsiders is a phenomenon that I have been quite fascinated by. In an ideal world, one should generally be secure in one's own identity and have a sense of worth that is independent of praise of criticism.

In reality, it often doesn't work out like that. Self-actualization is a process which, according to my understanding, is where one is finally comfortable in one's own skin. Knowing your strengths and more importantly, limitations. And also knowing there are somethings your limitations will prevent you from obtaining. I have come across a few in my time here in NIMHANS and I have noticed that they are often so calm and composed and seldom go all "I am going to screw the residents today"

I guess this process takes time. You need to experience a lot to know who and what you are, what are the things you can do and what you can't do. And coming to peace with that, not allowing outside static to change your point of view or your disposition,at the same time being a man of action and not caring about the reasult, is what I would term self actualization. I find it to be a Buddhist way of being.

Mind you, Hitler had a lot of the characteristics I mentioned above!! This applies to men of peace, not war!